I have been going to concerts alone and I’m starting to really like it. I have been living on my own for four years now and it’s hard for me to see another way of life even possible. I traveled from New Jersey to California alone for a week and had the time of my life. I truly feel that instead of looking for others to enjoy that jog on the beach or seeing your favorite band on a reunion tour, you have to go there alone. We live in a society in which we would rather miss the movie in the theatre than dare go out alone but I want to encourage you otherwise. Take yourself on dates, “treat yoself”, and fall in love with yourself by removing the stress of having to please others and the anticipation of others letting you down.
I would often stress that if I didn’t have someone to come to the event I wanted to I would have to miss it, but now I know that I will enjoy whatever I’m looking forward to it regardless if it’s just me there. Once you become your own best friend life becomes very liberating. One of my favorite quotes by Oscar Wilde is, “’To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance” which I’ve always referenced when I find myself in positions I know that I’ll have to manage on my own. In the grand scheme of life, you are all you’ll ever have so why not build that person someone to be someone you’d like to be around.
This mindset has increased my relationships with others as well since there is nothing I’m forcing or asking of them to do unless they truly want to go because they know I’ll go on my own. If you build up your self-confidence to “lonewolf it” on adventures you will also not be that boyfriend or girlfriend who drags their partner around but rather simply suggests. Now that’s one less argument when your favorite high school bands decides to play near you and you don’t have to figure out a negotiation on how you’ll get them to tag along.
Now, you’re probably wondering if this means I’m suggesting closing yourself off from the outside world is healthy— which I’m not. Let’s face it, your best friends or even your partner still have different interests or hobbies than you so why force these activities upon them? You don’t have to and you still don’t have to feel like you missed out because you’ve built up the self-esteem to be your own traveling companion. So go book that trip you’ve been trying to think of person to join and don’t let life pass you by because you’ll regret not going, rather than just going alone. One of the most refreshing revelations I made in my twenties was to look forward to all life has to offer with or without another.