Your Dick Smells, Too

If you happen to be one of the many women who are concerned about the odor of their vaginas, fear not. Just browse the “feminine care” aisle of your local drug store and you will be bombarded by a variety of solutions. There are wipes, washes, douches and even suppositories that you can insert into your vagina to keep it fresh.

As women, we are told over and over again to take care of our vaginal odor. Somehow, we have been convinced to mess with the beautiful, miraculous, self-cleansing organ that we call our pussies. We’re told to wax it, change our diets and clean it with harmful soaps.

close up of a woman body with  white  rose on her pubes

One problem is everything we do to try and maintain a “delicious” vagina is actually harmful to our vaginal health. Of course, you should keep your vulva clean and dry using cool water and a soft towel; but using douches, feminine sprays and scented soaps is actually harmful to the natural PH of your vagina and will cause yeast infections and bacterial vaginosis – and nothing smells worse than a good ole’ case of BV.

A more infuriating issue is that genital hygiene seems to be targeted exclusively toward women. When is the last time you browsed the aisles of a Walgreens and came across a soap, spray or cream for men to apply to their testicles and penises in order to keep their genitals fresh? I’d venture to guess never.

Even worse, the fear women have been taught to experience regarding the smell and taste of their vaginas has limited their ability to feel sexually fulfilled. According to a national sex study that was done by researchers at Indiana University’s Center for Sexual Health Promotion, men within every age category are more likely to receive oral sex than to give oral sex.

Of course, there are many reasons why this discrepancy may exist, such as lack of confidence in performance, cultural barriers and a failure by women to communicate their needs; however, I believe that a lot of it is driven by men not enjoying giving oral sex due to the natural taste and smell of the vagina, and women feeling self-conscious about it.

Every Tuesday I listen to the Savage Lovecast, a podcast where sex columnist Dan Savage answers callers’ very intimate sex-related questions. At least once per month, I hear women calling in to complain that their male partners will not perform oral sex because they “just don’t like it.”

Well guess what, gentlemen? Your dicks smell, too. Just because your penis happens to be an outie rather than an innie, doesn’t mean your phallus is a mass of floral-scented joy. The mere fact that— unlike our beautiful vaginas—your penis is not a self-cleansing organ means that after a long day of stocking groceries or sitting in your office chair, your shaft radiates a pungent, sweaty taint smell.

Yes. Your penis smells like butt. I honestly never understood why until a few days ago, seated comfortably in a local café in my neighborhood, when my male friend told me that penises smell like butt due to the build up of sweat that forms between men’s anuses, perinea and testicles.

I am not chastising men for having penile odor, because genitals have odor. It’s natural. I asked a friend of mine what his thoughts are on vaginal odor and he replied, “I don’t think anyone’s vagina smells good, per se. I don’t want to bottle it up and spray it around the room or anything. They don’t smell bad, but it’s not like they smell like vanilla beans. I don’t know. It just smells like vagina.” I think it’s safe to say that women feel the same way about men’s penises.

If you are a man who loves women, I’d like to ask you to educate yourselves about the added pleasure oral sex provides a woman. I’d like you to consider the absolutely amazing blowjob you just received from your girlfriend, despite your far-from-fragrant schlong. If you want to enjoy a woman’s body, leave your ignorance at home with your jersey sheets and your porn.

Lastly, women need to stop messing with our vaginas. Don’t let marketers, other women or your partner tell you that you need to fix or change anything about how you take care of your vagina. You don’t need to wax it. You don’t need to spray it. And please, for the love of god, you do not need to douche. Furthermore, I would like for us all to immediately demote any man who tells us that he doesn’t eat pussy due to the natural taste and smell of a beautiful flower.

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37 thoughts on “Your Dick Smells, Too

  1. For years in my late teens and early twenties, I shaved my vulva and cleansed it with antibacterial soap every. single. day. I couldn’t figure out how or why my vagina felt so uncomfortable. I was convinced I was doing the right thing, that I wasn’t “dirty” like I’d been told to fear, so the problem had to be in my wiring. Years of seeing male gynecologists didn’t help. Then, I was enlightened by a fellow woman about the delicate balance of our pussies and immediately, my vagina healed. I walked around with an irritated and uncomfortable vagina for a chunk of my adult life because I fell for the fear mongering our society places on the smell and taste of our vaginas. And I have a LOT of stinky blowjobs in pube forests to men who will remain nameless, without ever questioning this inequity.

  2. WORD. This speaks to so many pervasive patriarchal biases which have persisted in our cultural norms regarding women’s bodies and health. It is simply unacceptable to allow these implict assumptions to go unchallenged in this day and age, in which modern science can prove that they are objectively invalid and have no basis whatsoever except within the misogynist mindset of those morons who perpetuate them.

  3. You say, “Furthermore, I would like for us all to immediately demote any man who tells us that he doesn’t eat pussy due to the natural taste and smell of a beautiful flower.” If a female told me that she didn’t want to perform oral sex on me because she found the smell unpleasant I would never demote her for making that choice or having that stance. I think you’re a judgmental ass.

    • As a women I think this person ( the author ) is a judgmental ass as well.

      ” accept us for who we are , but fuck you for having personal preferences ”

      Some people just don’t like going down on men and the same for women

    • Well maybe some clarification could be given on the behalf of that person. My man says he thinks that eating the vajay is gross, but I’ve sucked his D. which can be gross. But since learning that he will never reciprocate, I have stop his utmost pleasure because he says he thinks that’s gross. He gets upset when I refuse but don’t expect to receive if you can’t give. Im pretty sure that was her point.

  4. I personally put the “I don’t go down on my girlfriend” mentality down to underdevelopment or immaturity in dudes. Admittedly, the first time I went down on a girl a lot of the sensations were intimidating and new, but now knowing what to expect, its my favourite thing to do in the bedroom.
    I’ve had partners who were too shy to either let me give oral, or in some cases to let themselves relax and enjoy it. Honestly its tragic because seeing your partner enjoy themselves is the hottest thing in the world.

    • Snid, from the age of 13 I always looked forwards to the day I got to bury my face between the lower lips of my Lover and enjoy the tastes and aromas awaiting me there. Nothing has ever driven me crazier than having the woman I Love cum on my face a couple times at least before indulging myself in sticking my cock into the vagina that I’ve made so very, very happy orally first. I literally notice a big change in my penis, I become so incredibly hard, longer as well as much bigger in girth after munching on her for at least an hour before I even think of giving myself any other kind of sexual pleasure, especially when my main goal is to make sure my Lover can take no more of anything else I can do to or for her that can make her sexual arousal any higher than I’ve already given her. When she’s ready to continue then we can go for it all over again, starting from where ever she now wants to start from. Trust me when I say, any man who expects a blowjob from any woman without going down on her at the same time or first, is definitely a total asshole who doesn’t deserve the woman that he’s with. Richard A

  5. Wow, to say this post stinks would be really too kind. If you are hoping for more cunnilingus by insulting both yourself and your partner, I have to tell ya, it won’t end well.

    Exquisite, complex, and alluring flavors and aromas are an acquired taste. The only way to come to appreciate them is to try them, again and again. Any “man” unwilling to acquire such a taste is not a man but a child with a hairy face. Pussies do not smell bad, ever. Sorry for your friend that thinks they do. Maybe he needs to spend more time with his nose in one. Dicks do not smell like ass either. If you smell ass while in the vicinity of a dick, the owner of said dick needs an ass wiping lesson. I recommend you ask your friend to clean his asshole or find a new girl.

    Oral sex is by far the most intimate and exhilarating part of sex and should be a component of every encounter. If you are going to go around teaching that you smell bad and so does your partner, you are not only doing a disservice to love, you are teaching little boys in men’s bodies, that it is ok never try the white stuff on the outside of the brie. blah.

    • “Pussies do not smell bad. Ever”

      Umm, WRONG!

      I love giving oral sex to ladies, but my ex’s pussy STANK! And I mean to a point where it was a turn off from even just having sex. It was pervasive, strong, and nauseating. She never even went to the doctor for it despite my constantly complaining, and even she thought it smelled horrible. She though I was “just playing”

      Anyways, after our divorce she finally went and got that pussy fixed, (ph balance problem I believe she said.) Good for her new boyfriend.

      Long story short…pussies can smell absolutely horrible.

    • It’s funny because everything you said sounds exactly like what the author is trying to convey, to say that that your self-indulgent post is narcassitic would be too kind. Have you ever smelled your hand after jerking off? I think you should try it and then give us a detailed report of the scent so that we may correct our language from “ass” to “sweaty taint potpourri.”

      • at the time I thought it would be helpful to reply to the post. I thought offering a point of view that doesn’t include judging yourself and others would be expansive. I am too sensitive for this though. What is the point of being insulting? I did not insult anyone by suggesting that you can shift your perspective, or wipe your ass. Enjoying oral sex is a good thing Nicole don’t you think it would be more fun than insulting?

      • Dude I can’t believe you would say ” dude have you ever smelled your hand after jacking off” first of all your assuming that everyone’s dick smells like yours and I can’t believe you would even post this without realizing it and second of all assuming only makes you an ass in this case an assdick. And I got to this post by looking up sani sticks for stinky sinks what the fuck

      • I can’t believe you asked someone if they ever smelled their hand after masturbating assuming that it would smell. Just because yours smells does bit mean anyone else’s will smell. And assuming this only makes you an ass , in this case an ass dick. But yes we all have smells after a time without soap or water it can be healthy or unhealthy . This is common sense. And I got to this post by looking up sani sticks for stinky sinks. But found s diffrent kind of stinky sink

  6. Well, I think its actually boys who are forced to undergo an unnecessary reduction surgery in order to prevent them from having “stinky dink”…

  7. Well then I must have a rare man then, he loves to give oral and relishes the taste and liquids. We both use enhanced flavoring,of our own choosing, not to hide smell or taste to enhance.

  8. Saying the genitals smell or have an odor implies they have an undesirable scent. Modern day society tells us that. What we detect “way down yonder” is something that evolved through time as a pheromone…in this scenario a scent to attract the opposite sex, not to repel it. Likewise, pubic hair is ape-like body hair retained through evolution to aid in capturing, retaining, and enhancing this scent. Smegma, found in both sexes, is a pheromone (“Hello!…”). As a sexual pheromone, it has it’s own unique scent. Dogs “get it”, otherwise they wouldn’t be sniffing it out all the time. Personally, I crave the musky, alluring scent of a woman and seek it out periodically but if I want the taste of strawberry, I’ll eat a strawberry sundae, not an FDS “strawberry”-laced woman with hangups about her “odor”. Only once in my sexual adventures was I repelled by the scent of a woman and I attribute that to maybe a yeast infection or something abnormal. Without saying anything to this partner so as not to embarrass her, I simply came up for fresh air and just never went back down, carrying on business as usual.

  9. Am I in the twilight zone right now? Lol The author and some of you posting don’t have any common sense. People that have stinky private parts do not wash them selves properly. It’s a known fact. The author says women should not clean Thier vaginal area and it will smell like a beautiful flower. Lmao! It will smell like beautiful road kill If you don’t wash it. I work at a jail and I’m around dirty women that don’t take showers and dirty men. The dirty female inmates smell worse then the dirty men. It’s because of Thier stinky vaginal area. I refuse to go down on a stinky female . It’s not about me being a boy and not a man like someone else said on here. It’s about me having common sense.

    • Ahem….

      ” Of course, you should keep your vulva clean and dry using cool water and a soft towel; but using douches, feminine sprays and scented soaps is actually harmful to the natural PH of your vagina and will cause yeast infections and bacterial vaginosis – and nothing smells worse than a good ole’ case of BV.”

      Let’s have a quick lesson on the different parts of the “vaginal area” that (unfortunately) many people are still confused about:
      Vagina – this refers to the canal inside the body, that you can’t see, where the penis goes (or fingers or toys or really whatever [hopefully clean thing] you are comfortable putting there).
      Vulva – this refers to everything that is on the outside, that you can see, though this area is often incorrectly referred to as the ‘vagina.’

      Not taking showers can definitely lead to a stinky “vaginal area” but this is due to secretions drying in the folds of the labia minora and labia majora, part of the vulva, which most definitely SHOULD be rinsed regularly, as our author suggests. If the vulva is kept clean a healthy vagina should not be producing any particularly pungent odour. Whether or not it actually smells like a flower would depend greatly on the woman and the type of flower, but I don’t think many people were confused by the author’s use of a metaphor 😉

    • Aww. I think this little boy got offended by the fact that his putrid prick smells like a shit infested asshole. You need to accept the fact that you didn’t actually read the article. You also need to accept that you’re a sexist pile of pig shit that couldn’t hit the g-spot on a 12-pound pussy. Soap is unhealthy for a cunt. You’d know that if you had one. Now shut the hell up, quit throwing a misogynistic tantrum at a woman calling your gender out for the fact that you shame women for having a natural feminine odor when your cock and balls smell like sweaty cheese and quit making up stories about how males smell so much better than females. All it does is subtly suggest your penchant for being a bit of a rump ranger. Fuckin’ butt pirate.

  10. There´s a big difference between some dicksweat and smegma overgrow/misbalance. And just like our “beautiful penises”, your vaginas can get out of control and go past the range of normal genital odor. If you stick two fingers in and they smell like rotting fish, you´ve got a problem. Just take care of your bacterial infection if you have one and wash yourselves before sex. It´s a matter of respect.

    • I’m not in total agreement with you. you should never need to wash your pussy, it’s self maintaining and anything that shouldn’t be in there will end up in your underwear with the fluids that drip out. Unless of course you have some disease that needs fixing. There’s nothing I hate more than a woman straight from the tub or shower for they always wash away any and all the taste and aroma I Love so much.

    • I missed the beginning and for this you are 100% correct, if a man showers and washes his nuts and Penis properly then a quick cleaning before expecting any woman (unless she likes dried piss with her blow jobs) Then there’s the guys like my neighbour who got flesh eating disease on both sides of his crotch, nearly losing everything he holds dear, is just a lazy pig and to expect any lady to get her face full of this kind of shit is really crazy. Remember ladies this stuff is out there so don’t worry about how your pussy smells, beware of a guys smells first!!

  11. If I don’t go down on a woman it’s probably because we have deeper issues than odorous genitals. It’s not the smell, he’s probably just not that in to you, or he’s a lazy dick. Either way the relationship should probably be evaluated.

    Probably goes the other way as well…

    • I’m going to say this makes sense but there are still men out there of euopean decent that actually think va woman is only meant to screw and the thought of oral sex is disgusting to them. One young man I knew when I too was much younger was Portugese and was engaged to this luscious sweet girl that had remained a virgin as she thought it was the right thing to do. Meanwhile he was screwing every skank he could get their pants off, wandering here. At any rate I knew he thought eating pussy was gross and I told him if he didn’t go down on his new wife before taking her virginity, it’s something he would regret it forever. When he got back from his honeymoon I asked if he tried and if he actually enjoyed his sweet wife. He said he tried it but didn’t enjoy it at all. I was totally blown away that he could not enjoy his beautiful wife and she was destined to a boring sex life with a husband who was definitely going to cheat on her always!

  12. Pingback: A Little Poem About Hygiene – miaadore

  13. As a bisexual man, I have a bit of perspective on both. Its true that *anyone* who doesn’t properly take care of his or herself is going to have problems with body odor. I’ve given head to my fair share of both men and women with, (to put it lightly) less than strict hygiene.

    That said, I’m not sure I’m a believer in this idea that we all have like everything equally. I wouldn’t and shouldn’t expect my sexual partners to leave their comfort zone for me. I’ve been with women who just aren’t into sucking cock, and men who don’t like anal. Whatever my partners have a preference for, I try not to take it personally.

    Ill go down on a (clean) guy all day long, but I admit I do rarely go down on women. I don’t expect anything in return, but then I don’t see every act as reciprocal. I don’t want to feel forced into something I’m Just Not That Into, and I wouldn’t want to coerce anyone else into something theyre not comfortable with. Thats just my 2c.

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